Tuesday, October 23, 2007

the eyes


I look at that face and I see trust.

I look into those eyes and I see love.

I look at her and all I can do is hold back the tears.

Tomorrow we go in to meet with the vet about the seizure activity that has sprung back to life. She's had three in the past month and a half. The last one was on Thursday of last week. Kev was home with her. I should say the last one we know of.

It hurts me to know that she's probably going to have to go onto medication that may alter who she is. I don't want to lose my dog.

I won't know to what extent things might change until tomorrow. But tonight I am scared. I love her more than I ever thought was possible.

She trusts me and all I feel is that I'm letting her down with the thought of the drugs she'll have to be on. I know that it will be for the best, in the long run. But I also know that she won't be the same dog for a little while as her body and system adjusts to the meds. Four years ago she had a seizure in the early morning. We'd hoped it would be a one time thing.

It wasn't.

5 comments:

bronxbt said...

oh sweetheart... yer puppers is the luckiest puppers in the world to have you and your hubby as her pets.

you both love her so, care for her, protect her and will continue to do so until someday in the future (looooong ways away) she'll be ready to leave your sides.

only the best animals find the very best human pets... and she found you two. with that decision brings trust. she trusts you to do the right thing.

take care of her. guide her through some scary times as she adjusts.. and keep us updated.

lurve ya all
B

Jack K. said...

Ditto.

Josie is lucky to have found you.

Love y'all.

Dad

StarSpry said...

I am so sorry :( I really hope they can give her medication to stop the seizures but not alter her personality.

k said...

Oh Shanny, I'll be thinking about you as you figure out how to take care of Josie. Hopefully it's just stress induced imbalances she's fumbling through and when things calm down she'll be better.

We had a scare with Delilah last week--she'd been favouring her right rear leg for a while (doc told us it was a strained ligament or some such and to keep her from roughhousing too much), and suddenly she was unable to put any weight on her left rear either. She was doing the odd little walk-on-the-front-legs-only thing, when she'd move at all. She pretty much spent the entire evening in one spot, unable to get up. We took her to the docs the next morning for x-rays and tests(she was acting completely normal by this point). Seems she just has some arthritis--already!--and is now on an anti-inflammatory. She's so much better now; we have a hard time remembering to try to keep her from wrestling with Bucket.

Anyway, all that is just to say that I'm hoping you have the same fortune with Josie.

Becky said...

Oh, how sad. I'm so upset whenever my dogs are sick -- I hope the vet's able to give her something so that she can remain "your" dog.